Beyond Words: How Yoga Became My Voice of Healing

Find your voice of healing

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Find your voice of healing 〰️

"Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve taken pride in the ability to make people cry. 

Not in a bad way….mostly in a cathartic way.

Every Christmas my cards leave my mother in a puddle. Music recitals and live performances of Hallelujah have left rooms misty eyed. And now my classrooms give permission for people to shed some serious emotional shit - usually in the form of heavy sighs, “fucks sake”, and….tears.

And rather than taking ownership for something that’s not totally mine; I just create the space + container for whoever to pour their big feelings into. I feel into what people need and do my best to help navigate towards wholeness, fullness and happiness. The pro of being a hardcore empath.

If I can be a contributing factor to someone feeling at home in their body, and learning how to look at what we used to label as imperfection as power - then I’ve done something right.

There were two pivotal points that lead me to this course of ‘Yoga Teacher’.

Maybe would’ve been three if it had been an option on the career quiz they gave out in high school. Instead back then it was suggested I would be a great therapist; probably what set off my time with social work.

The first moment I fell in love with yoga was 2011 in Wickenburg, Arizona. I was in my second round of treatment for an Eating Disorder over the span of my 17th birthday. There was an instructor who would ride her bike up a big hill in the heat to come and teach yin yoga to us.

Now, in a place like this, movement sessions had to be earned: engage in therapy, eat your food, be kind to others….. Leave it to an eating disorder to figure out how to manipulate and ruin just about ANYthing.

So the first few weeks I would watch the other girls go into that yoga class feeling one way, and walk out so much more blissful. By the time I reached the level to participate I was beyond ready to experience it myself.

I can still remember that first afternoon in her class; laying in an extended savanna while she came around and laid her thumbs on our third eye. The sun made the entire room golden and her skin smelled of vetiver and other earthy element oils. For the first time in my preteen and teenage life….I surrendered. It felt so fucking good. And I immediately thought: if she can help me feel like this, I want to help others do the same.

The second pivotal moment in this ‘becoming’ was 2012, the same week I moved to Portland, one month after my 18th birthday.

Having been short of a miracle that I managed to graduate high school, with some running start Community College credits at that, I had zero excitement or motivation to hop into more college classes.

I googled yoga studios near me and found one just ten blocks down SE Division: The Bhaktishop.

My first class there I was greeted by the neighboring business’ sign: ‘MARI’ - an art studio. After class I met the studio owner who prompted me to check out their upcoming Yoga Teacher Training….and there was no turning back.

During that training I delved DEEP with my cohort into the Upanishads, The Bhagavad Gita, and Light on Yoga. Asanas were a small part of the training compared to the philosophy and spiritual connections. We discussed the Eight Limbs of Yoga and how to realistically apply these focuses and practices into our lives.

And then: it all clicked. Movement became my medicine. The ultimate remedy to the disconnect and struggles I had endured for so many years. So many therapists and specialists.

Quick disclaimer: I am in no way shape or form ever going to bash therapy. What I do want to make a point of here is that we usually think about verbal or sedentary processing when we think of the “usual” forms of therapy we have access to in the US. ‘Talk-Therapy’ has it’s place and purpose. And then there is so much it can leave behind for the body to process that doesn’t necessarily want to come out in words, or with the throat chakra at all. (Shoutout to EMDR and Tapping for shifting that!)

I get confirmations around this all the time. I’m not a workout instructor. I’m a work-in tour guide. An activator. A conduit to light you the fuck up so you can find your spark and feed your fire again. I’m making 17 year old me proud.

So when a student approached me after everyone else had left post-class last week and sobbed in my arms because “in your class I feel like I not only like myself but I love my body for what it’s done for me”…I secretly smiled. Yes she verbally shared some of her journey and pain, but it’s because she M O V E D through it first. And that classroom with the space for this beautiful human was created because I moved through mine first.

I am a yoga instructor because yoga saved my life.

I keep teaching yoga because I get to witness it saving others every single day. "

-Stay Curious

Mari Gisele